Feeling Uncertain is Common – What To Do When “Everything” Falls Apart
There are a few very important things to remember when you’re feeling uncertain, as if you are losing your sense of freedom and choice in your situation; when it seems like “everything” has fallen apart.
Among these are:
- It’s likely not true that everything in your life is going wrong at the same time.
- Tough times like we’re going through now are temporary.
- Tendency to self-isolate in such times is natural; it is important to be mindful whether or not it actually serves you and choose accordingly
Feeling unsettled or in doubt about what’s going on around you is the very definition of uncertainty. It is very stressful.
When you don’t know what’s waiting around the corner, whether more illness, more lock down orders, or more rules about how you are “allowed” to behave, it’s understandable that life in general feels unstable. Your normal balancing act feels precarious, at best.
Yet, while all of that may be true in the moment, you would do well to remember that it is but a moment; a particular point in time that cannot last forever. And, while current effects may be significant in the short term, the situation is unfolding and can lead to interesting and even exciting changes over the long term.
Plus, and as experience shows, human beings are incredibly resilient. By our nature, we bounce back from crisis and consistently move forward in spite of trying times. We have recovered – and will again. In trying times, we get a better understanding of our values and realize what is truly important for us. What are you discovering in this process so far?
Reclaim Your Inner Freedom Through New Ways of Self-Care
At the moment, it’s entirely reasonable for you to feel like your life is being controlled by some unmanageable circumstances. In fact, to a certain extent, it is. This brings to mind a favorite quotation:
“When we are no longer able to change a situation, we are challenged to change ourselves.”
– Viktor E. Frankl, Man’s Search for Meaning
When the freedom of doing what you used to do for fun and recreation is being limited by arbitrary constraints, you can use the momentum of this unsettling energy to discover where true inner freedom lies. Inner freedom is not the ability to eat or drink out, or attend the shows and sport events (although these opportunities can bring us very pleasant experiences).
Rather, it begins with a distinct type of self-care; an ability to connect with yourself and know yourself at a deeper level, learning and growing from adversity and bouncing back stronger from it.
As a result, you will stop being dependent on your regular coping mechanisms and will discover fresh ones. Instead of holding on to the familiar, you will learn to adjust more effectively and develop psychological flexibility. You can also discover the real value of staying connected with other human beings, as well as the rewarding feeling of expanding and helping others.
Being Mindful in Crisis Enhances Your Choices
Practicing mindfulness in challenging times is helpful because it creates space for your emotional responses and choices. Doing so will enable you to choose differently during adversity, with a focus on caring for yourself as well as others.
This will also lead to a sense of renewal; of increased confidence in your coping skills and your ability to prosper in the face of adversity. These increased feelings of competence will also enable you to regroup and re-energize for any new challenges that may be upcoming; in the next week or month, or even the next year.
When you restore your feelings of inner freedom, you redeem your sense of self; salvaging your life as a value that you truly own. That is hugely empowering and will lead to an almost unfailing growth mindset.
If you feel like you need to connect and get to know each other – if you’re still feeling uncertain – book a free session, where we can brainstorm an action plan or reflect on your experience of going through the current transition – click here to schedule your free call.
