We’re all familiar with the economic theory of scarcity vs price. That is when resources are limited and prices inevitably rise. When it’s relieved, equilibrium is reached and prices begin to come down again. But, what about the human version, the scarcity mindset vs the possibility mindset?
When empathic leaders receive negative feedback, a switch goes on inside them and a compelling behavioral pattern of suffering comes into play. What follows is negative self-talk along the lines of: “My work is unacceptable!” Or, “OMG! I’m a failure!” Or, “My boss is really upset. I need to fix it right away (if not sooner!)”.
In other words, empathic leaders respond to such feedback with a scarcity mindset. Their sense of perspective in those moments is missing in action. The scarcity of well-balanced self-regard creates conditions for self-blame to rise. They accept blame for everything that may have gone wrong without regard to others who might have been responsible. Their overly developed sense of attunement to the emotional states of others automatically ignores where the cause of the issue may actually lie and places it directly on their shoulders.
The Possibility Mindset in Practice
A compassionate leader who possesses a possibility mindset, on the other hand, would respond very differently. She would
- Consider whether the challenging feedback has value.
- If the answer is yes, she will see the opportunities presented by this feedback to take her empowerment to the next level.
Her self-talk might sound something like this:
- “This is interesting! How can I use this as an opportunity to display my unique strengths and talents?”
- “I have so much talent on my team, what can we do to take better advantage of it?”
- “How can I turn the negative feedback I received into an empowering call for action for my team (and me!)?”
A possibility mindset and empowered self-talk create opportunity while scarcity thinking and negative self-talk lead to staying stuck and disempowerment.
Managing your mindset can be a serious challenge. There are so many factors that influence what you believe about yourself, implanted at a very young age and reinforced by life experiences. However, it’s not impossible to do and objective guidance can be a great help.
Moving Away From a Scarcity Mindset
It’s time to shift your self-talk away from the scarcity mindset: “Jobs are limited,” “It’s hard to find new opportunities,” “I need to hold on to whatever I have now,” and the like.
Instead, you need to move toward the possibility mindset: The ability to receive the abundance of opportunities and OPTIONS that life has in store for you. This paradigm shift completely alters the power dynamic for you. You will become EMPOWERED instead of approval-seeking.
Remember, you should never put yourself – let alone your mental and physical health – in a vulnerable position because of your fear of letting go, discomfort with things and relationships ending, or a scarcity mindset.
Instead, dare to LEAVE the survival game of Overgiver’s Hamster Wheel.
There is a simple test to identify the Overgiver’s Hamster Wheel pattern: count how many times during the day you sigh (aloud or inside). I am curious to find out what your number is. Please, feel free to shoot me an email with your OGSR (Over Giver Sigh Rate).
Need help making the shift from a scarcity mindset to a possibility mindset? That’s where I can help. To get started on your transformation… Feel free to contact me for answers.
